Distress is when you have pain, suffering and misfortune.  Distress can cause people to be depressed and anxious.  It can cause you not to be able to think straight.  This happens because your body will go into survival mode so that you can feel safe in your emotions.  Our brain can get out of control when things happen.  This can cause people to have unhealthy habits such as drugs or even working out too much to help forget the pain.

Needs

When you have feelings of distress, you are more than likely in need of something.  You might need to feel that you need to be accepted or you might need quiet or peace at that time.  Instead, we get into a pattern of negative thinking and thinking how our live could be better and different.

When you are feeling these feelings, you need to find out what you need at the moment.  If you say you need less stress, keep asking why you need less stress, what is causing you stress and let your mind have the details of your feelings.

What You Want

Focus on things that you need and focus on what you don’t need.  If you don’t want to be alone, focus on that and find someone to be around that makes you feel that you are not alone.  Figure out what your needs are and what you want.

Meeting Your Needs

Once you know what you want, do it.  When you communicate your needs with yourself, find a way to support them and get what you need.

Move

When you are really stressed out, try moving.  Do some type of exercise or walk alone and talk to yourself with positive words.

Nurture

Allow your inner voice to talk to you and to give you positive insight.  Don’t take away who you are and what you have accomplished just because you are upset.

Be a kind person and compassionate with others and let your brain learn to be kind and not self-criticizing.

Golden Rule

Learn to treat others how you want to be treated but also replace this by treating yourself how you want others to treat you.

Learn to be gentle and honest with yourself and others.  Work on being kind and even when there is a negative, put a positive with it.  Acknowledge that you did something great even when it was hard.  Forgive yourself for things that you have done wrong and accept that no one is perfect.

Gesture

Figure out what you can do to make a positive memory in your mind.  Put your hand on your heart and name five positive things that you have done.  Do this daily.

Perspective

When you are upset from pain in the past, figure out a story that is true.  Don’t focus on things that you have made up that are negative.  Talk about the situation that you were in and see if you can see the outcome from a different perspective.

Grounding

Make sure that you are grounded in the present moment.  You can do this by running warm water over your hands, notice what your body is doing, see five things in the room that you can feel and sense, think of an inspirational song and sing it, count from 10 backwards, watch a show on television, find something on the radio to listen to and imagine that you have a wall between you and the pain.

Conclusion

You have to learn to deal with the pain and distress that life brings.  Make sure that you find a strategy that can help you to reduce these feelings and be more positive in your life.